Mealtimes can be a challenge for toddler owners. Training a younger toddler how to operate the tools at her disposal may prove to be as difficult as keeping an older toddler interested in staying at the table. Overall, when programming your toddler’s mealtime protocols, set reasonable goals and remain consistent with routines and limits.
1. Divide responsibilities. Parent responsibilities include selecting and purchasing food, preparing meals, regulating the timing of meals and snacks, restricting food as necessary, attending to appropriate mealtime behavior, and providing consequences for inappropriate mealtime behavior. Toddler responsibilities include deciding how much (if anything) to eat.
2. Set a good example by modeling good table manners and making healthy food choices. Prompt and practice important skills (e.g., saying “please” or “excuse me”). Teaching your toddler appropriate mealtime behavior is a long-term process-the correct behaviors must be repeated over and over before your toddler will demonstrate them on her own.
3. Provide frequent praise (”You sat like a big girl at the table today”) and brief physical rewards (e.g., hugs, kisses, love pats) for appropriate table behavior. Do not reward with food, especially candy or dessert, as this can make your toddler think of these foods as sources of comfort and love, making them more appealing than they already are.
4. Ignore minor misbehavior (e.g., whining, food refusals, minor tantrums) at the table. Briefly turn away for 5 seconds without speaking to or making eye contact with your toddler; then immediately return your attention when the toddler is behaving appropriately.
5. Use a brief time-out for major misbehavior and rule breaking (e.g., banging utensils, throwing food, or purposefully dumping a plate). Time-outs at the table can be enforced by having all adults and siblings turn away briefly, by pulling the toddler’s chair away from the table, or by turning the child’s chair to face away from the table for a short time. If you must use more than three time-outs in one meal, remove any remaining food items and end the meal. By ending the meal early, you avoid turning mealtime into a battle and creating negative associations with food. Experiencing a little hunger before the next meal or snack is harmless and may even motivate your toddler to behave herself at the next mealtime.
6. Do not scold your toddler if she chooses not to eat; however, expect her to remain at the table for a reasonable length of time-about 10 minutes.
