Although Nancy doesn’t have a lot of time for dating with all the sleuthing she must do, she manages to take an occasional break and enjoy some fun in the company of a young suitor. When she does go to a party or dance, she makes the most of it, often combining dating and detecting. When a fellow is relaxed and under your spell, that’s the best time to really get to know him, along with his dreams, his goals, and his deep, dark secrets.
1. Accept invitations from a variety of suitors.
You may be surprised to find that what you thought was your “type” may not be as interesting as a man who doesn’t quite fit your mold. Like trying a range of foods or solving a number of mysteries, dating a variety of men makes life richer and helps you gain valuable experiences-and often information- from each encounter. Even a seemingly average guy can offer some surprises, if you know how to find them.
2. Take the time to dress up.
No matter whom you’re dating or where you’re going, this is the time to engage in a little dress-up fun. Pick out a new frock or enhance an older outfit with fresh accessories, such as a bold belt, a stunning necklace, or an antique brooch. If you’re on a case, opt for a brooch that can pick a lock, a locket with a hidden microphone, or a necklace that doubles as a concealed camera. Then get a manicure with polish to match your outfit, and try a new alluring fragrance.
3. Look at the positive instead of the negative.
Sometimes a date goes well simply because you have a positive attitude. Even if he turns out to be a long-winded bore or self-serving egomaniac, think about what you’re gaining from the experience: a new adventure, a nice dinner, an evening on the town, a chance to dress up-and perhaps a clue to a puzzling mystery.
4. Be your charming self.
We all have moods, even Nancy, although she tries her best to hide her negative ones. Dating is the perfect opportunity to be your witty and charming self. Bring up entertaining topics, such as a strange situation you’ve experienced while sleuthing or “hypothetical” mystery you’re currently working on, to turn a dull date into an amusing-and revealing- evening.
5. Don’t discuss past relationships.
This is not the time to talk about other men. Keep the focus on the two of you. If he asks about your previous boyfriends, simply say, “We weren’t compatible.” Don’t blame the other party or drag out the details of the relationship. And don’t ask him probing questions about his past relationships either. It’s an obvious interrogation ploy that rarely produces useful information. If you want to uncover secrets, be subtle.
6. Determine your interest level in your date.
The first date offers the opportunity to get to know the other person as well as you can in a short period of time. Ask questions, listen attentively, and let him know when you agree with him. Don’t be judgmental or make snap decisions about him early on-he may not be what he seems. Of course, you don’t want to give him false hope if you’re not interested in him, but don’t discourage him first thing, either, or your plans for the date may be ruined.
7. Keep it light and fun.
Keep the conversation neutral. You may certainly discuss serious topics, such as a mystery investigation or curious clue you’ve discovered, but keep things positive; otherwise, he may think you have ulterior motives for the date. Draw him out on topics of interest, and if you’re not familiar with something he says-such as an archaeological term, a canoeing maneuver, or a secret password-let him know. He’ll enjoy telling you more.
February 24th, 2009 at 12:16 pm
I enjoyed reading this! It will help me more in the future with dates! Thanks Again, Julie in MS.